Walled Gardens
by Inky Perspective
Summary: Slight AU. Jessica Stanley has spent her entire life striving to make something of herself in the eyes of her peers. It's time she finally learned, though, that it is not how you are seen by others that matters, but rather what you make of the time you have left.
1. Chapter One: Swinging Roads

**Summary: ** Jessica Stanley has spent her entire life striving to make something of herself in the eyes of her peers. It's time she finally learned, though, that it is not how you are seen by others that matters, but rather what you make of the time you have left.

**Disclaimer: **I, Inky Perspective, make no claims to own the rights to the Twilight series. Nor do I have any desire to, as I am content with merely exploring the worlds and scenarios in which the characters reside in.

**Walled Gardens**

**Chapter One: Swinging Roads**

"_We all wear masks, and the time comes when we cannot remove them without removing some of our own skin." _

– _**Andre Bethiaum**_

Jessica Stanley was, by and large, not a fan of road trips. They were long, monotonous, and uncomfortable. Spending multiple hours confined in a small space, enduring bumpy roads and obnoxious company was not exactly how she intended to spend her free time. She had things to do, places to see; road trips were just another form of karma screwing with her weekend itinerary.

But Bella had begged and her mother had insisted, so here she was: presently shoved into the backseat of an admittedly large vehicle, traveling at ungodly speeds down the Interstate, feeling the slightest twinge of nausea in the pit of her stomach.

Crammed into the seats beside her were Jacob Black, of all people, and Alice Cullen. Between the pair, Jessica felt as though her body was on the brink of spontaneous combustion due to a severe case of temperature confusion. She couldn't quite explain why Jacob seemed to be radiating such extreme warmth where Alice was freezing to the touch; truth be told, though, she didn't really even care anymore.

Honestly, she didn't still didn't quite comprehend why she had even been invited on this little expedition in the first place. She and Bella certainly hadn't been close as of late, and Edward seemed to merely tolerate (an extreme understatement) her presence. Then there was Alice Cullen who, as far as Jessica had ever known her, seemed to gloss over Jess completely. Jacob Black, too, was an odd mixture to the already misfitted group. Last Jess had heard, there had been some insurmountable tension between Jacob and Edward; palpable tension that followed them at every turn.

But, hey, whatever; if their tension could detract from Jessica's obvious misplacement, then Jacob make himself comfortable. Jess might even bake him a cake if it would draw any and all attention from her.

"Have you thought anymore about where you're going to school, Jess?" Bella piped up from her position in the front seat, her hand cradled in Cullen's grip.

Jessica pursed her lips, pausing for a moment. "Mom has her eye set on the University of Washington," she said slowly, "but I'm actually looking at Stanford right now."

The car was silent with the exception of the tires slapping against the pavement, the ninety mile-per-hour winds assaulting the vehicle's exterior.

"Oh," Bella said, turning slightly in her seat to meet Jessica's gaze. "That's a rather…admirable aspiration."

It didn't take super hearing to make out Edward's scathing snort.

"Do you know what you're going to major in then?"

"Law," she said quickly. "I'm hoping to do something with law. Or, if that doesn't work out, a political position would be nice, too."

More silence.

"Well, good luck, I guess."

Jessica ran a hand through her hair, sliding sheepishly down in her seat. She had always known that the Cullens (and Bella, too, for that matter) had never really thought much of her. To them she was the dumb gossip that was torn in an imaginary love triangle between the plebeian Mike Newton and the "lust-worthy" Edward Cullen. In their eyes, the thought of her merely passing biology would be miraculous, much less admittance into the prestigious Stanford University. _Ha,_ she thought to herself, _I wonder if I told them if I was in the running for valedictorian they would think I was making it up._

Probably.

Edward coughed from the front seat, his grip visibly tightening on the steering wheel. Good, maybe if he actually paid attention to his driving, her anxiety would be calmed a little. (Not extremely likely, but it was a nice thought.)

"Are you guys excited for the trip?" Alice said from behind her, her ever-present charm present in her tone. "I, for one, am thrilled to finally have the opportunity to see some of the more unheard of destinations – the diamonds in the rough, if you will. Places like that are just so magical."

Jessica rolled her eyes. Stanford was evidently a bit far-reaching for her, but Miss Sparkles and Sunshine? Nah, she could be president.

"What exactly sparked this trip anyway, if you don't mind me asking?" Jessica said, reaching for the drink in the cup-holder. It required leaning across Black, her arm grazing his flannel shirt. He stiffened at her touch and she sighed. Great. Even the outcast of the group was annoyed by her presence.

"One last road trip, y'know. Before graduation."

Jessica had always considered herself to be an expert BSer and knew it when she saw it, and that, right there, was _total_ BS. While at one time Jessica and Bella had been reasonably close (and that was stretching the truth a bit), they certainly hadn't been good enough pals to roadtrip together. And, aside from that, there was also the fact that Bella had blatantly ignored Jess for the better part of last year and, if Angela was correct, slammed her at almost any possibility.

_Maybe Angela was busy and Jessica had been the last resort? _

So, no, Jessica did not_ "know"_ and Bella still hadn't answered her question.

And Jess was tired. Tired of pretending that she fit in with these people; these people who were rolling in the money when Jessica's family was barely making ends meet; these people who passed their judgement without cause and refused to move from their position; these people who had taken a simple, innocent girl and managed to shape her into a mindless puppet.

Edward barked a laugh from the front seat and Jessica narrowed her eyes.

Yes, she would be happy when this was all done and over with. When the idea of seeing these people again would be a distant, laughable memory.

_Just three more months_, she told herself. _Just three more months until graduation._

Then the Cullens would inevitably pack up, relocating themselves to whichever prestigious university they could pay their way into. Harvard or Dartmouth? Just a matter of which had the better shopping district. Maybe she'd even hear about them on the news when they announced the cure for cancer.

She would then be able to point at the television or the article in hand and say, "Look everyone, I knew them. They were a bunch of privileged, pompous asses. Now their egos are even more inflated with a couple of Noble Peace Prizes in hand. Aren't they lovely?"

And so Jessica simple closed her eyes.

* * *

"Jess, wake up, we're here."

Her eyes fluttered open, squinting from the car door's light. "Hgnn…?"

"We're at the hotel," Bella said, reaching out to push on Jessica's shoulder. "You're rooming with Alice and Jake."

Which meant that Bella would be sleeping with Edward (and possibly even getting down with a little bit of the nasty), and Jess would be rooming with the pixie and the seven-foot tall man-boy. In this situation, bunking with Bella even seemed more desirable. Jessica couldn't help but wonder if she could rat out the rooming assignment to her mother; Beverly Stanley would definitely not be okay with the thought of her baby girl rooming with a reasonably mysterious man. One who rode a motorcycle, no less.

But for some unfathomable reason, Jessica had been invited on this trip. And she couldn't let her mother down by bailing on the first night.

So she closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and unbuckled her seat belt.

"Just tell me where to go," she said sleepily.

Evidently the group had already checked in, electing to let Jessica continue her nap in the car. She couldn't decide whether it was an act of good nature, or just another ploy to rid them of her presence. Either way, Jessica was grateful as she hauled her bags into the elevator. Even if she would be going back to bed in just a few minutes, having as much sleep as possible certainly didn't hurt.

Especially with her sleeping situation at home as precarious as it was.

She trailed behind Alice and Jacob, their heights oddly disproportionate, as they meandered down the hall to their room, her bag slapping against her thighs.

The room they had been placed in was relatively small with two queen beds. "You and I will be sharing, Jessica," Alice beamed, depositing her own large (and pink) bag onto the bed closest to the door. Jessica smiled weakly, fishing her phone from her bag.

"Thanks Alice," she said softly.

Jacob looked up at her from across the room, his brow wrinkled in confusion.

"I'm just going to go call my mother; let her know that we made it in okay," she said, waving her phone in the air. "I'll be right back."

She grabbed the room key from its position on top of the television, making her way into the hallway. Biting her lip, she scrolled through her contacts before finally reaching her mother's name.

She paused, listening to the dial tone, before the phone finally clicked, signaling her mother's response.

"Mom?"

* * *

**Author's Note: **I know I should be working on Wheels in Motion, but I'm having major writer's block with it. Thus, this was born on, coincidentally, my family's recent roadtrip. I do think it should be known in advance that I'm not really a fan of the Twilight series; but with that being said, I have moved past my _major _issues with it. Because, despite all of its flaws (and there are certainly plenty of them), there are still multiple characters with plentiful unexplored potential. Like Jessica, for example.

So for those of you that remain loyal fans to the series, rest assured that this fic will not be a total slam fic. But also please keep in mind that this is Jessica's story, and Jessica might not be quite as forgiving of the characters. All I ask is that you keep that in mind upon reading. A character's opinions do not necessarily equal my opinions (and vice versa).

And remember, reviews are form of miracle grow for writers. Just a thought. ;)


	2. Chapter Two: Sliding Doors

**Summary: ** Jessica Stanley has spent her entire life striving to be something in the eyes of her peers. It's time she finally learned, though, that it is not how you are seen by others that matters, but rather what you make of the time you have left.

**Warnings: **Prior substance abuse/abusive situations. If that's a trigger for you, I would steer clear of this chapter. Also, there's quite a bit of butt-hurt towards some of the characters. Please keep in mind that this is from Jessica's perspective, and that does not necessitate that her views are my own. If anything offends you, I apologize to a certain extent, but if you're a diehard Bella or Edward stan, I suggest you look for fic elsewhere.

* * *

**Walled Gardens**

**Chapter Two: Sliding Doors**

"_You need to learn to be happy by nature, because you'll seldom have the chance to be happy by circumstance." _

– _**Lavetta Sue Wegman**_

When Jessica was only seven years old, her father passed away in a car accident. It wasn't really a surprise when the news came; they had all been expecting the inevitable for a long time coming. For as long as she could remember, the bottles had always been at the forefront of her father's priorities – Jessica, her mother, and her brother all be damned. All that really mattered was that their liquor supply remained consistent.

For a while, things were bad. Some nights he would come home slamming doors, reeking of cheap perfume and cigarettes, his breath pungent from the alcohol he had undoubtedly been guzzling throughout the afternoon and evening. Jessica could still remember the night that her mother had actually attempted to confront him: her words heated, her fists clenched. Jessica could hear the shouting, the heated, slurred words, and when the resounding slap rang through the house, she stumbled out of bed and into Simon's room. She didn't even knock; he was already there, crouched in the corner, his eyes bright. Her older brother looked like he was prepared to bolt, his body coiled tightly as if prepared to run down and challenge their father – to end their mother's disparity. Something on Jessica's face must have stopped him, though, for he opened his arms instead, allowing her to cocoon herself in her big brother's embrace. He was only nine years old, too young to have done anything to prevent the tragedy unfolding down the stairs, but he was old enough to know that abandoning his sister in that moment would not solve any problems. So he hugged her tighter, whispering comforting words in her ear until she fell asleep, still wrapped in his arms.

The following morning when Jessica staggered down the stairs, her hair plastered to her cheek from her tears, she found her mother sitting at the kitchen table, nursing a mug of coffee and a dark circle rimming her left eye.

"Mommy?" she had whispered, stretching a hand out to touch the stark contrast surrounding her mother's blue eyes.

"It's okay, Jessie. I'll be okay," she whispered. "We'll take care of this. I promise."

A few nights later, the news arrived with a knock on the door: news that Anthony Stanley was dead. He had been involved in a head on collision, the police officers said, and the damage was so extensive that he had been dead long before the paramedics arrived on the scene. To her credit, her mother did not cry. Rather, she steeled her shoulders, straightening her spine, and asked about the state of the other vehicle.

It was a small relief to be able to say that for all Anthony Stanley's faults, and there was certainly plenty of them, they did not have to add murderer to the already extensive list.

For a while, things were difficult. Her father had always been the bread winner for the household, and suddenly her mother, Melissa, was thrust into a new role. A role that she took to brilliantly once she managed to secure a position in real-estate. It was something she loved dearly, something she was good at. The Stanley's would never be considered wealthy, by any means, but they were able to comfortably make ends meet – especially once they were no longer spending hard earned money on alcohol.

For a time, things were perfect – they were finally happy.

Unfortunately, though, happiness can't last forever.

* * *

"What's on the agenda for today?"

Alice glanced up from her position on the bed, biting her lip. "Well, I was thinking that we could maybe hit some of the tourist traps today. There are some mini-golf courses scattered around the area, even a little amusement park; though I'm not really sure it could be considered a legit amusement park…"

Jessica sighed, tightening the bow that held her hair back from her face. Of course, tourist traps.

"Erm, okay," she said. "Um, couldn't we, maybe, just go to the mall or something? I mean, we can play mini-golf anywhere. How often do you get to go to one of the nicest shopping districts in Washington?"

Alice looked at her as if carefully selecting what to say next. It was as if she were deciding the best way to diffuse a bomb with as little carnage as possible; it was a look that set Jessica seething. "Well," she began, "I don't really think the boys would appreciate being dragged to the mall for a whole day. Bella either, for that matter. I'd so be for it if it was just us girls – I mean, I _love _shopping – but Edward and Jacob would be very unhappy. And Bella would probably spend the whole trip pouting."

Of course; if it didn't make the boys happy, or God forbid, Bella, than how could they even have the audacity to consider it as an option? Silly Jessica, for assuming the trip to Bellevue was actually to visit the Bellevue Square – one of the main attractions of the town.

"Okay," Jessica murmured. "How about we just play it by ear? I mean, if all it's going to do today is rain, we might as well head somewhere indoors."

Alice beamed at her, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "We'll see," she said. "Now, let's go meet the others. I think they're already eating breakfast."

With a sigh, Jessica grabbed her bag and jacket, before double checking her reflection again.

When the pair emerged from the elevator, it was to find the other three standing in the lobby, waiting. Looking particularly annoyed. Great.

"So, guys, are we ready to go yet?" Alice chattered. "I have some of the best ideas –"

But her rambling was interrupted by the sound of Jessica's stomach giving off a distinctive grumble. Feeling her cheeks flush, she mumbled, "Sorry, I haven't had breakfast."

She glanced back up, only to see Jacob staring intently at her. The others seemed to look flustered at the idea that Jessica hadn't already ate. "Alice said you guys would be eating breakfast, so…"

It was quiet for a moment, until Jacob spoke up. He said, "I think they still have some Danish's in the dining hall. I could go get you one if you would like?"

"That would be awesome," she said, smiling gratefully. For as strange as Jacob could seem sometimes (honestly, until this moment she never understood the appeal of hanging around with people you apparently could not stand; at this point, though, that would be like the pot calling the kettle black, before teaming up to pal around with the cauldron), he really was the most considerate of the group. And, quite possibly, the sanest.

For all that Bella liked to believe that she was normal, Jessica had long since decided that she was the farthest thing from it. If anything, Bella often tended to reside on the emotionally unstable side of the sanity scale – Edward being her tipping point. Despite her numerous protests, having such a fixation on a high school relationship was not healthy. Jessica didn't mind Edward, used to like him even, but there was nothing he could offer that should have genuinely prompted that much of a psychotic break, even with the "true love" argument. The entire Cullen family seemed to be composed of compulsive liars, though, so she supposed that Bella's mental lapse probably made sense in the grand scheme of things. Probably made family get-togethers real chummy.

Then there was Edward who had his own plate of issues, the majority of them tying back to Bella. There was, of course, the fact that he was, and probably always would be, a grade A douchebag. Jessica was, perhaps, still a little sensitive towards his blatant and unreasonably rude rejection. While Jessica couldn't necessarily understand being propositioned to the point of frustration like Edward undeniably had, it wouldn't have hurt to be a little less of a dick about it. Then there was the fact that he always seemed to be looking down his nose at everyone around him. It got old. Fast. Jessica had even seen him do it to Bella a number of times, but she seemed to put up with it; anything to get good old Eddie to stay with her. Jacob was the only one who seemed to see through his act, though; something that was impressive considering Edward seemed to have the entire community charmed and wrapped tightly around his pale little finger.

Alice, too, was a mystery to Jessica. Sure, she was friendly enough, but there was so much bottled and manic energy to her that Jessica honestly didn't quite know how to act around her. She could be prattling along about the newest fashion sensations one minute, before getting a far-away look in her eye, her mood instantly dissolving. Alice was certainly a little on the strange side, but of all the Cullens, she was the one that Jessica could actually try and relate to. They weren't best friends, by any means, but they got along reasonably well. Unlike Bella and Angela, Alice seemed to forget that Jessica had gradually become a social pariah. She was friendly, likable, and, despite Bella claiming it to be her idea, Jessica had no doubts that it was actually Alice who initiated the idea of bringing her along when Angela had prior commitments.

She closed her eyes, tightening her grip on her bag at the thought of Angela.

The pair had been best friends since their pre-school days, and had sworn that their friendship would never die. The two were polar opposites, most of the time, but even when they each gained new respective friends, their own friendship continued just as strong as ever. Until Bella came along. Bella who instantly disliked Jessica for some unfathomable, immediate reason. Bella who enchanted the entire school and consequently forcefully shoved Jessica out of her group of friends; the friends who had been her support system whenever money was tight, whenever the anniversary of her father's death rolled around. They all turned to the new girl in fascination, and when Bella made her distaste for Jessica known, her friends gradually began to trickle away. This year, instead of Angela showing up on her doorstep with a pint of Ben and Jerry's before heading to the cemetery, Jessica went alone. Instead of spending her birthday with her best friends, she spent it in her bedroom, waiting for her mother to get home from work so they could have dinner together. (In the end, her mother missed dinner and didn't show up until 9:30 that night, when Jessica had already cleaned up the candles and cake, put the leftovers from the uneaten dinner she had made for them in the fridge, and set off to answer the Facebook wishes she had gotten instead of hugs from her actual friends. Angela hadn't even bothered to send her a happy birthday text.)

Which begged the question as to why she had even bothered to go on the outing with the girl who had singlehandedly, intentionally or otherwise, ruined Jessica's life. Mainly, she rationalized, it was for her mother. Her mother who was worried about her, and insisted that it would spending the weekend with friends instead of studying would be good for her; maybe afterwards she could even invite Angela over to spend the night?

"Here you go, Jess."

"Thanks, Jacob," she said, taking the pastry from his hands. "You're a lifesaver."

"I live to serve," he smiled. "Your wish is my command."

It really was unfortunate that Jacob was still so hung up on Bella. Everyone could see that her relationship with Edward wasn't ending any time soon, and, God forbid it ever actually happened, Jacob would simply be reduced to the rebound guy; perpetually waiting in the wings. He was sweet, he really was. He deserved better than a haphazard friendship with a girl who could barely see outside her own rose-tinted goggles.

A sharp cough from Edward startled her out of her thoughts.

"Er, should we head out then?" Bella asked, wringing her hands together. "If we're going to try to mini-golf, we should probably leave before it starts to rain."

The group nodded, Jessica remaining silent, as they trampled out to the car. Maybe if she didn't get to shop in Bellevue Square, they could at least visit the Rosalie Whyel Museum. Maybe she could even hijack the car at some point. Edward could be fairly distracted whenever Bella started making bedroom eyes in his direction; maybe she could swipe the keys and just take off. She might even take Jacob with her, if he played his cards right. She couldn't, in good heart, just leave him there, after all. It was the only right thing to do.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Um, hi. It's been quite a while, hasn't it? I cannot begin to apologize for why this has taken so long to be updated. I didn't initially intend to do much with this in the first place; it was just a plot bunny I was working on while road tripping after graduation. Since then I've had my summer job and a crapton of work for school robbing my free time. Thankfully I am finished with finals and am on Christmas break, which means I actually have some time to write. Hopefully you'll see an update between now and February, if all goes according to plan. Hopefully. *fingers crossed*

Another note, I've never actually been to Washington, so my information about Bellevue might be a bit incorrect. I'd be happy to make corrections where necessary, though.

As tomorrow is supposedly the end of the world, please be safe, dear readers. I doubt anything will actually happen, but people can be notoriously stupid. Just… be careful of anyone rioting. Or for those of you in inclement weather (the blizzards in the north eastern part of the US, the wind storms here in Kentucky, and elsewhere in the world), be careful! And, above all else, regardless of what you celebrate: **_Happy Holidays!_**

It wouldn't hurt to review, either, if you're feeling up to it. Just, you know, an idea. :)


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